Today I’ve got this Issue on my Nationstates (nationstates.net)
What’s In A Name?
A man by the name of &%*\@# Smith hit the headlines yesterday when he had his first name legally changed to ‘John’, citing the ridicule and stress he suffered because of his given name. Mr Smith publicly commented afterwards that there should be more restrictions on what parents can name their children.
I’ve encountered with 3 choices
1. “People do so love to be different,” says Insert Name Here, with a heavy sigh. “I don’t know what my folks were thinking when they named me. Probably about how ‘novel’ and ‘with it’ they were being, but I didn’t get a say in it did I? Growing up in my neighbourhood with the first name ‘Insert’ wasn’t fun at all I can tell you! The government should set up a registry of recognised names that are clean, sensible, and non-teasable. Kids deserve better.”
2. “It’s none of the government’s business what I name my daughter,” says Follicle Rainbow Gooseknob, cradling [expletive deleted] in her arms. “Are you going to tell us what to think next? Where to go? Who to love? I don’t want some grey-faced bureaucrat deciding what name is appropriate for my child! What kind of country hates personal freedom so much you can’t even choose your own name?”
3. “Names? Names are so inefficient!” says Five-Oh-Three McGoohan, counting beads. “Who can honestly tell one Jennifer Fellow from another? That name’s so popular now, I met three people at the mall with it just last week! Face it! Names are old-hat! Everyone ought to go by a government-allocated ID number instead, much more practical. Who could make fun of a child named Six-Eight-Four?”
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Option 1. sounds nice so I choose it.
The result saids ‘Parents must choose their children’s names from a government-mandated master list.’
In result, my nation get a boost of this qualities.
Social Conservatism
Bush-Santorum Dawning Terror Index 3.2%
And decline in this qualities
Nudity
Cheeks Per Square Mile 0.24%
Intelligence
Quips Per Hour 0.37%
Inclusiveness
Mandela-Wollstonecraft Non-Discrimination Index 0.65%
Civil Rights
Martin Luther King, Jr. Units 1.4%
Recreational Drug Use
Pineapple Fondness Rating 1.7%
Ideological Radicality
Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index 3.8%
Not nice
